The 80’s was one of the best, if not, THE age of rock….as well as long hair, garage bands, and denim and leather pants. Aerosmith, Slayers, KISS, all were rock gods in their own time, and some still even continue to make hits today.

Then grunge came…..

Not that I find anything wrong with grunge, I happen to be quite partial to it myself. I was just using that analogy so I could…well…ugh, let me start over.

In 2005, a video game called Guitar Hero was released, a music rhythm game that although wasn’t that very much different from other rhythm games, it came packaged with one huge difference: an actual guitar controller. Now thanks to Guitar Hero, we can all live our own dreams of becoming a rock star instead of simulating that dream by throwing up bullhorns and playing the air guitar looking like these tards:

Then the bigots came.

And these bigots I’m referring to are those dickheads the completely snuff Guitar Hero simply because it’s not real. Yes, I’m talking about YOU guys. Despite it’s extreme popularity, there’s a whole bunch of people out there that despise Guitar Hero, or people that play Guitar Hero. These are the people that for some apparent reason like to look at things they hate, in this case look at Guitar Hero videos on Youtube to leave “play a real guitar dumbass” comments after smacking their own head with a sledgehammer so they have the mental capacity of a 5 year old, just like the majority of Youtube users. (Which is either a VERY well hidden Youtube policy that for the life of me I can’t find, or just tradition. And if it is policy, then God help me, I might be getting 10 to life soon.) I don’t understand these people. We are just trying to have fun, NOTHING MORE. You guys are just upset and feel the need to criticize those who enjoy the game just because you can’t play the songs that these games simulate you playing on a real guitar. Are you a rock star? I didn’t think so. If you were, you’d probably be rich and famous (or at the least, a little bit more sophisticated) and would probably b doing better things with your life than posting bratty little hate comments on Youtube. And if you CAN play these songs, that’s GREAT. I respect that. (Seriously.) So either go out and make a name for yourself, or shut the fuck up and leave us alone.

What these people simply refuse to realize is that most people that do enjoy the game don’t actually care to learn a real guitar. What they do care about is having fun. Having fun NOW. Last I checked, that’s all what video games are about.

But guess what? You don’t see anyone telling people who play Wii Tennis to go play actually tennis. You don’t see anyone telling people who play Dance Dance Revolution to go learn how to dance. (Or Twister.) You don’t see anyone telling people who play Time Crisis or House of the Dead to go out and shoot other folks with a real gun. (Then again I don’t think certain lunatics need to be TOLD that, they do it anyway) None of these games “completely” recreate the real feeling of what it’s trying to simulate. (Even though I’ve never touched a Wii before, I can imagine that a Wii stick is a hell of a lot lighter than a tennis racket, which I’ve held before.) So why do people bitch about Guitar Hero? Well, I may not have the answer, but here’s my theory: Guitar Hero is “popular.” I think it’s safe to say that Guitar Hero has finally taken DDR’s crown. Now all that’s left to do is put Guitar Hero machine in the arcades. (And then call a priest to perform a blessing before some spastic kids break the damn thing in five fucking minutes.) So I guess others feel it’s their birthright to be an asshole and ruin other people’s fun, in this case by making players that play games that don’t involve a standard controller feel like posers to the real thing. But have you ever taken into consideration that maybe I don’t want to spend $500+ on a real guitar, guitar strings, base amplifiers, and speakers just so I can play a song nobody cares about after years of practice. So unless I have the sudden urge to become a rock star and squeeze playing guitar into my life, I need cheap instant gratification NOW. Not 20 years from now. Sure, the game only simulates 5 lousy frets, and “this” is actually closer to the real thing. (But have you heard the frikin thing?) But I’m sure you can bet your ass that playing “Happy Birthday” on a real guitar is a lot easier than “this.” (Yes, I know that’s Frets on Fire.)

Ok fine, so basically Guitar Hero players are being able to do what took others a lifetime in 6 months. But that’s exactly why these games exist. To be able to feel like you are a rock star instantly. Why do some people think that it is so wrong to dream? It’s not like we’re getting paid to bring our 360’s, PS’3’s or Wii’s to stadiums and hook it up to a projector and expect the crowd to cheer like we’re the next Metallica. Don’t forget we’re limited to songs that are PROGRAMMED.

“Sorry folks, we had a request for Stairway to Heaven but none of the Guitar Hero games have it.”

I liked rock music before and after Guitar Hero. And playing Guitar Hero just makes me respect the bands even more, it doesn’t make me feel better or just as good as them. So you haters out there, I understand where you’re coming from. But stop going around ruining our fun for the sake of your “pride.” Because if that’s pride to you then I don’t feel sorry for you. I wouldn’t care if your the next Dragonforce.

Yeah, learning a real guitar would be nice. But currently I don’t have the time to be learning one. If I started now, it would feel more like work than fun. So pardon me while I go have “fun,” like these guys are having.